Easter 2012
(or maybe 09?)
Pubescent blonde
Incandescent room
A Borders shop
Just outside of Philly
Wide eyed
Jet lagged
Desperately needing to piss
I limp to the front counter
Politely asking where the toilet is
& with a look of slight confusion
the staff member nods
We weave through the aisles
Rush of relief
As I follow this angel
To my bladder oasis
The ascending staircase
Each step a touch more
Painful than the last
But suddenly
We stop mid aisle
The staff member turns back to say
“Here you go”
As they start to walk away
I start to realize
Exactly what had happened
They thought
I had actually asked for a Twilight
Instead of a toilet.
We had walked
Across the entire store
Just to stop at an aisle
Filled with Twilight DVDs
Rather than the bathroom.